Alisa Govender: Confessions of a Facilitator

Name: Alisa Govender

Location at time of writing: Sharjah, Dubai and Pretoria, South Africa

So here I am, writing the second confession and this feels a bit like being the “first follower” joining the lone guy dancing wildly on a hill… Let’s create a movement!

“I didn't expect facilitation to teach me…”

Back in 2015, I joined the TUKS Young Research Leadership workshop facilitated by II’s very own bright-eyed and wide-smiled Maggie and our charismatic Puleng. As many of our workshop participants do, I thought it would be a standard sit-and-listen type of thing. Nope. It had speed networking, generous listening, painting (!), and challenges that felt playful and profound at the same time. After nine full hours, I didn’t even want to leave. Apparently, that enthusiasm was spotted, because soon I was asked to help mentor, then apprentice, then… well, here we are. What I’ve learned is that facilitation isn’t about standing in front with the answers. It’s about holding space, listening, and creating moments for others to shine.

“In my part of the world…”

From Pretoria to Rwanda to Sharjah, and countless Zoom rooms in between, one thing is universal: people come alive when they feel truly heard. Honestly, “generous listening” might be the cheapest, simplest, and most radical tool we have.

“One time, everything went sideways…”

Oh, COVID-19... Virtual facilitation was… hmmm... let’s just say character-building. Breakout rooms froze, connections dropped, and I once ran an activity that landed with the energy of a deflating balloon. The feedback from colleagues? “Smile more!” (Apparently staring intensely at your screen isn’t very inviting!) But I discovered that if you hold the space with humour, even when tech rebels, people will laugh, reset, and keep going.

“My weirdest / most wonderful tool is…”

Feedback… PPC/o. It sounds painful, but it can be magic. When co-facilitators used our own feedback tool on me: “Smile more! Or, be more animated.” Ouch - it hurt - but I knew that it was true. It reminded me that facilitation is passion with a splash of performance, but also a lot of practice.

“If I could change one thing…”

I’d change how we think about balance – Yes, Izzy 😊 . My facilitation journey has stretched through loss, motherhood, postpartum pauses, divorce, and meeting my soulmate. And yet, each time, this community graced me with patience and empathy, embracing my absence and welcoming me back with the same trust. Balance isn’t about staying upright all the time. It’s about stumbling, pausing, and still being invited back into the dance.

So yes, I’m the “first follower” in this confession series. But maybe that’s exactly the point: movements aren’t made by lone dancers. They happen when someone else is brave enough to jump in, laugh at themselves, and keep the music going.

Now, excuse me while I go practice smiling at my laptop screen. Before I go, I nominate Leo Muñoz to follow next… And I wonder, Leo, what is the genre of music that you and your family might jive into this circle with?